S2 Quotes

2.1 Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
Jack: Oh yeah, I love that office-y feel. I always get excited in these places. To me they're exotic. Office romances... Photocopying your butt, well maybe not your butt, although whilst we're here why don't we photo-
Ianto: The rift was active at these coordinates, approximately 200 feet above ground. That means this floor or the roof.
Jack: How are you, Ianto?
Ianto: All the better for having you back, Sir.
Jack: Can we drop the 'Sir' now? I mean, while I was away, I was thinking, maybe we could...You know, when this is all done...Dinner, a movie...?
Ianto: Are you asking me out on a date?
Jack: Interested?
Ianto: Well, as long as it's not in an office...Some fetishes should be kept to yourself.

Jack: Looks like we're going to have to go through every drawer, bin and plant-pot.
Ianto: Right, OK. I'll do this floor, don't want you getting over excited. You take the roof, you're good on roofs.
Ianto: Jack? Why are we helping him?
Jack: He's a reminder of my past, I want him gone...By the way, was that a yes?
Ianto: Yes, yes...

2.2 Sleeper
Ianto: 'Just us. In this room. As long as it takes.' Terrifying.
Jack: Really?
Ianto: Absolutely. Shivers down my spine.
Jack: You don't look scared.
Ianto: Well, it passed.

Jack: Have faith, with a dashing hero like me on the case, how can we fail?
Ianto: He is dashing, you have to give him that.
Owen: And what if they can't stop it?
Tosh: They'll stop it.
Owen: Yeah, but if they can't?
Ianto: Then it's...all over.
Owen: Let's all have sex.
Ianto: And I thought the end of the world couldn't get any worse.

2.3 To The Last Man
Jack: This time tomorrow he'll be back in 1918.
Ianto: In his own time...Would you go back to yours, if you could?
Jack: Why? Would you miss me?
Ianto: Yep.
Jack: I left home a long time ago, I don't know where I really belong. Maybe that doesn't matter anymore.
Ianto: I know you get lonely.
Jack: Going home wouldn't fix that. Being here, I've seen things I never dreamt I'd see, loved people people I never would have know if I'd stayed where I was...And I wouldn't change that for the world.

2.5 Adam
Ianto: Coming here, it gave me meaning again. You.

Jack: Oh, by the way, I found your diary.
Ianto: Ah, yes, I've been looking for that.
Jack: And for the record, measuring tapes never lie.
Ianto: Fuck.

2.6 Reset
Martha: So, Jack asked me if I could get you a UNIT cap to wear.
Ianto: Did he? Well, red is my colour.
Martha: So, am I right in thinking that you and he...
Ianto: We... dabble.
Martha: Yeah?
Ianto: Yeah.
Martha: So what's his "dabbling" like?
Ianto: Innovative.
Martha: Really!
Ianto: Bordering on the avant-garde.
Martha: Wow.
Ianto: Oh yeah.

2.9 Something Borrowed
Jack: Nope, like that one. Good choice.
Ianto: I estimated Gwen's size from the Hub's security laser scans. As you know, my dad was a master tailor; he could size a man's inside leg measurement by his stride across the shop threshold.
Jack: Ah, a family eye. Remind me to test it some time.
Ianto: Well, if later on-
Owen: Jack!
Ianto: Yep, brilliant, like that one.

Ianto: That's what I love about Torchwood. By day, you're chasing the scum of the universe, come midnight you're the wedding fairy.

2.10 From Out of the Rain
Jack: Ianto, with me. I need your local knowledge.
Gwen: Oh, is that what you're calling it these days?

2.11 Adrift
(After Gwen walked in on Jack and Ianto)
Gwen: Ianto, hi. I'm sorry. I didn't realise-
Ianto: Doesn't matter.
Gwen: I wouldn't have come in if I'd known-
Jack: Always room for one more. We could have used you an hour ago for naked hide-and-seek.
Ianto: He cheats. He always cheats

2.12 Fragments
Jack: And you are?
Ianto: Jones, Ianto Jones.
Jack: Nice to meet you Jones Ianto Jones.

Jack: Thanks for the assistance.
Ianto: Any time. By the way, love the coat!

Jack: Quite excitable!
Ianto: Must be that aftershave.
Jack: I never wear any.
Ianto: You smell like that naturally?
Jack: Fifty first century pheromones, you people have no idea!

Ianto: Like a butler! I could be a butler!
Jack: We don't need a butler.
Ianto: Excuse me, dried egg on your collar!
Jack: It was a busy week!

Jack: Come back with me. I've got somewhere nice and big where you can fly around.
Ianto: So you'll let the pterodactyl in and not me?!
Jack: I need a guard dog
Ianto: I could be that!